December 2011
You look pretty today. →
the-absolute-funniest-posts:
What, was I ugly yesterday?
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lovenialler:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY VOLDEMORT
AND HAPPY NEW YEAR
may it bring you many unicorns
and money for a nose job
and a wig
and you should go tanning sometime soon you’re looking pretty white
oh and please get new clothes
peace n blessings xo
Raising your hand for the obvious question so you... →
When everyone loves the person you can't stand.
‘okay fine.’
3rd grade:
friend: *whispering* if you're stupid say "what"
me: what
friend: OH MAN
OH
OH DEAR FUCKING CHRIST
I GOT YOU SO GOOD, THAT WAS AWESOME
SWEET, SWEET DICKS IN MY MOUTH. I HAVE NEVER LAUGHED THIS HARD. EVER.
JESUS. JESUS HELP ME.
When gym teachers make you run a mile.
After 3 feet:
ONE DAY I WILL HAVE A LIFE
BUT NOT TODAY!
My family when someone wakes up before anyone...
Me: Tips toes quietly through the house, trying not to make a sound.
Everyone else: Let me just stomp through out the house, slam a bunch a doors, and bang some pots together in the kitchen, I'm sure no one will mind.
mom: let me see your blog.
me:
me:
me: *throws computer out of window*
me: what blog?
Set Fire to the Rain
thehalfcastkidd:
When you give someone a long ass explanation &... →
the-absolute-funniest-posts:
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"Get off the computer and go to bed"
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I tried to catch some fog earlier...
I mist.
me: mom can i hang out with my friend next weekend
mom: where are you going to go
mom: what's their name
mom: where do they live
mom: how old are they
mom: are they from the internet
mom: what are their favorite colors
mom: what about hobbies
mom: what about pet names
mom: do you have a boyfriend
mom: are you lying to me
mom: what enthic group are they
When you're going to sleep and it's too hot in...
Parents: Okay we're leaving. We'll be back tomorrow.
Me: Okay and I'll have a wild party.
Parents: That's not funny we all know you don't have any friends.
Me: I know.
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